boredddd

haha i cant tag on my tagboard so i shall reply tags here

binbin and engsin: i'm so proud of both of you!! seeing you two riding distances to and fro that short little pathway made me feel warm and fuzzy inside somehow :))) but i think more credit goes to our mo gui jiao lian tyz..really damn funny seeing the way she pulled u all along at a scary speed into grass patches!! nway binbin i really admired how brave u were lor..but u scared me by the way you recklessly cheonged into the grass and always almost crashed into trees! and engsin! u need to be more brave and not so scared of every little seed you see along the way! :p

zit: haha let's go fishing again!! but this time i will definitely smear a one-inch thick layer of sunblock all over my body! i don lik e tennis too much though, but i dont mind sitting by the side and taking pics of you all :D i think badminton's easier and more fun!

went to mind/mind's? cafe wif vips, yuensau and zk ytd...very fun!! balderdash seemed so fun and amusing when i played it wif yz they all so i recommended it to them to play but they din seem to enjoy it THAT much though den i felt paiseh inside hahaa..but vips and zk are damn zai in jenga la damn stressful to play wif them! and yuensau was like losing consecutively for a few rounds! haha! lousier than me! :p

i actually am looking forward to going to school...i miss studying..(im not a mugger! :x) rotting away at home makes me feel bored and lonely..so im really happy that im going to ouou's house wif bin tmr! hope i dont end up sleeping on her big queen-sized bed as usual haha...

ok i better go sort out the US trip photos into the various sizes i wanna develop them in..procrastinated for damn long oredy..but at least i selected those i wanna develop oredy!

tuition tonite....wonder how im gonna cope once uni starts..but i'll see how la..shall take things one step at a time...

ok enough of rambling..

i'm never NEVER going out into the sun for the whole day without putting sunblock again!! im awfully sunburnt now and its damn damn pain..i underestimated my impossible-to-tan-skin! as far as possible (i.e. when i'm at home) i try to go braless..putting on and taking off clothes has become such a painful chore to me!!

but ANYWAYYY, fishing was really fun...i'm serious! what i mean is not only the fishing part of it, but the whole package of going to fish..it's damn laidback, relaxing and carefree..i render now that most people fish not really cos they want the fish itself, but more of a tranquil way to pass a nice sunny day outdoors..fishers either go there to look out at the beach, reflect on their lives, or engage in a heart-to-heart talk with their friends, which was wad zit and i did..reeling in the fishing line was just like a side-job once in a while when we were hoping for a pleasant surprise that there'll be a fish at the end of our line each time! haha we were not very successful fishers, we only caught a crab the entire day! but its a CRAB!! how cool is that! its medium sized, with filter-like hairs on its pincers and legs (which made it damn difficult for us to free our crab from all our tiny hooks)..it could be a HAIRY CRAB!! hahaha ok of cos i dunno i dont study crabs..it was quite badly entangled..we dont think it was actually feeding on our raw prawn bits bait, but rather it just unfortunately swam into our line and got tangled up..

it was very funny cos when zit first pulled her line up we werent actually expecting anything, after our futile wait for over 3 hours...then we saw sth long and shelly clinging onto the line!! then i was like, "wa! is it a prawn! no it looks like a lobster!" and after a while i realised it was a crab!! we were both very excited but we didnt know how to free the crab..and i merely let out a small shriek when the crab first started jumping about which induced zit to bellow an echoing scream which reflected off the whole stretch of breakwaters im NOT exagerrating..haha..and we were being damn losers because we wanted to free our crab and save our fishing line at the same time so we took turns, one of us using an umbrella and a piece of cardboard to hold down the crab's pincers while the other person using scissors to remove the hooks..in the end we gave up and just cut off the line! and we used the end of the fishing rod to nudge the crab back into the water..in the end when we pushed it to the edge of the jetty it jumped in itself! so cute!

and i realised fellow fishers are all DAMN NICE...really..whenever you walk past them they'll ask you if you've managed to catch any fish yet..or when they say they've caught one or two, they'll open their box and show you their catch..there was this group of malay guys near us and they were very friendly! which made our day so much nicer..not the flirty kind of friendly but the genuinely nice kind of friendly..like when we were walking out towards the carpark, one of them was behind us..he caught up with us and chatted a bit with us and halfway, he said he gtg and he RAN off! haha like he was in a rush but still bothered to be friendly to us..and two other old man taught me how to fish a bit too cos noob me was about the cast the line when my weight got stuck in the wooded barrier behind! this is damn loser cos we're supposed to swing our rod from the back and in my midst of swinging the line got caught behind! and i was hoping those two men won't stand there and look at me casting the line anymore!!!

anyway, pictures of our catch!! zit posing with the crab! can you all spot it??

our crab all entangled with our fishing hooks

our freed crab!! :D

scenic view of labrador beach from the jetty :)

pretty picture!

other than that, this week has been about meeting up with many of my close friends! i'm happy that you're fine oredy dear! i know i've said this a lot of times but i really really admire you for being so strong, mature and gracious, especially so for a girl...

swimming wif kwa just proved that i'm destined to stay fair! like when we talked i would be standing in the sun and she'll be hiding in the shade..and after we got out, i hadn't the slightest bit of tanline, which she was chaotah on the back cos her swimming costume had a sexy revealing hole at the back (hehe! :p)

went for med checkup wif binbin too..and submitted our hostel application fees...thinking about it just reminds me that i'm gonna start on a new phase of my life very soon..we all are..i just hope nothing will change very much, though i know that it will...hmmm oh well..

hehe can't wait to teach xiaogui and binbin cycling on tues!! i really hope that they'll be successful lor! :DD

2 more days!!

haha my life's not as lonely and depressing as i expected to be, cos of really wonderful friends around me! and i'm going fishing wif zit on thurs and im really excited cos its my first time and hopefully i can get a tan (which would go off in a week anyway sigh)! she's gonna prepare all the fishing stuff and im in charge of bringing food to feed ourselves and i dunno why im feeling so excited about the whole thing haha..i'll most prob throw the fish back into the sea if i do catch any so its just for the fun of waiting for a fish to bite onto my bait! haha..

and tomorrow im meeting all my dearest friends! :)

hmm i was still worrying i'll be bored to death like how i was before i started working and everyone else was working, but now i'm really pleased with how things are cos i got more than enough stuff, including self-given homework like doing a scrapbook for my US trip last year which would probably take up a lot of time and which i probably forgot lotsa stuff oredy haha..and i actually dont have that much time left! especially since now i'm going for the orientation camps and such...dunno if i should feel happy or sad that my days are gonna be packed now...i'm actually quite contented wif lazing around the whole day, just that it really makes me feel piggy..

here's wad my typical lazing around day sounds like:

12.30pm: wake up, brush teeth & wash up

12.30-1.30: eat breakfast/lunch and browse thru newspapers

1.30-3.30: slack online, collate pictures for my 2 scrapbooks

3.30-5.00: laze on my bed= sleep

5.00-6.00: look thru stuff strewn all over my messy room

6 plus: my daddy returns! wif dinner and all, continue lazing on my bed

7.00-10.00: dinner + tv

10.00: go online/read harry potter 5 (planning to finish it before i watch the movie!)

haha looks damn sad and boring right...but its ok i'm a boring person who likes sitting around doing nothing anyway :p

During zk's rare and precious 4 day leave, we went to the botanic gardens to watch Happy Feet! wanted to watch it when it first opened in cinemas but din get the chance to...plus this time it was free entry! haha! no la..just sounded quite nice to go..its part of the events for Family Week, and this event was a closure to the whole campaign! and Dr. Vivian Balakrishnan was there! I tried to sneakily take some shots of him but got quite poor results..try to spot him! he's in red! hehehe

And zk fished out a rose he sneakily bought in the morning before he met me which he hid in his dirty bag (haha!) but which made me very very touched cos it was his first flower to me :)))

pretty shot of the rose

(haha i took many more ARTISTIC shots given my penchant for flowers but too lazy to upload! and i think everyone would get bored anyway)

And this is how he spent the day (forgetting about me) before he left for Brunei that Sunday night:

haha we both found this photo damn funny cos he looks damn stupid! and being the lazy pig, he couldn't bother to shift those blankets above his head away, but just STUFFED his head underneath them which makes him look like a TOOT MUSHROOM!

just one more week!

yesterday was my last day of work and i really do miss my colleagues a lot, even though i didnt especially enjoy working with a few of them..they were really really sweet...all sportingly posing for pictures with me even though they all dont like taking photos..they wanted to treat me to lunch too but another colleague pulled me off and later when i came back the group which wanted to treat me scolded me for running off! haha actually i didnt forget but of cos it'll be damn paiseh to walk up to them and ask, "eh so we're going for lunch together right?" cos all of our doctors haven finished running their clinics yet so none of us had left yet..and it'd be damn thick-skinned of me to ask them cos obviously they were gonna treat me!

in the end they bought me these two cute cups!

some pictures with my colleagues!

at the counter

with the nurses! the one on the left very pretty right! she's already a mother of 2!

with beelan and laychoo- they very cute la must purposely put on this serious look when they're taking pictures! they're not so glum in real life!

Auntie Lai!

hmm i really dont mind going back to work leh..the only reason why i stopped was cos i din wanna be a loser (haha im not referring to u yk! :p) and work my whole holidays away...but i think im a loser now cos i got nothing to do at home! and another reason was cos i wanted to cherish not having to wake up early in the mornings before school starts..but i think i already got so used to everything in the clinic..my colleagues, the environment..my job scope..i think i've become very proficient as a Patient Services Clerk oredy lor! hehe..

anyway..on to other things..my appeal was unsuccessful..i didnt actually have much hopes la..its just the feeling of being rejected and feeling that im lousy all over again..i've long known i'd be contented with accountancy..cos i'd have more freedom in my life which is quite important to me cos i wanna go on a lot a lot of holidays to all the nice and romantic and memorable places...but i think its natural to feel sad...but i'm sure i'll get over it by today la! haha think my daddy like checks the website every hour or something! cos i was rudely awakened on my first day of not working by my mummy who told me about the news my daddy told her haha..but im really touched by how much my parents love me and care about me..my future..i used to get irritated that they kept pushing me to do things i was not sure i really wanted..but now i know they do it cos they really love me and want the best for me..like how my daddy kept taking it upon himself to draft my appeal message of just 300 characters..and what particularly touched me was that his ability to express himself succinctly in writing is not very good yet he kept writing and writing draft after draft, which i didnt really use n the end cos i still have to write these kind of things by myself ultimately wad..ya i really really appreciate my parents a lot..and my mummy is a really great source of assurance and support..she is always able to make everything seem like its ok...

i guess, whatever my future will bring me, i'll just take things one step at a time..after all, i'm more than lucky to be blessed with all the nice people in my life..my parents, relatives (esp kimmie!) friends and zk...shall stop harping on what i did not achieve but be contented with what i already have!

and some pictures of social night! made some interesting discoveries.... (hope they dont kill me! haha)

ahem ahem (haha!)

hmm i'm really really thankful to have you in my life dear..thanks for being so sweet and tolerant towards all my stupid little tantrums..i dont need you to specially feel a certain way or do things you usually wont do for my sake, cos it'll not be you anymore and you're perfect the way you are already..even though at my 'young' age now, academic setbacks and all seem to be the most major setbacks, i know that whatever path i may take, everything will be fine eventually as long as i have you in my life..love you!

on a sidenote, you can see i'm really bored to have posted such a long entry..but nvm, time is in my hands! haha! must go write down a list of things to busy myself with oredy..all those unemployed souls! go out with me! haha...

i really do believe that time is the healer of all wounds..after a while, everything goes back to its usual routine and we soon forget what had made us so upset and it becomes impossible to imagine how we could get so upset or disappointed over that certain something..but of course, healing requires one to have a shift in his or her own perspective, in order not to wallow in self-pity or depression or indignance..but its true that there's nothing too big for us to overcome..such that once its over we no longer really recall it and it'll seem as though we haven been through any setbacks in our lives cos once we've gotten over something, we will not call it a setback anymore!

anyway, back to happy things, zk's sister is really very sweet!! she went to msia and she bought two tops for me! i'm just really touched cos i din think she'd remember me on a holiday..and i really like them..they're not something i'd buy myself (haha in fact i dont even buy clothes for myself! all my clothes are bought by my mummy...so i guess her taste naturally became mine haha :p)..but they're the type i'm shy to buy for myself but will feel excited to wear cos they're stuff i dont usually wear!

here's a pic of them :) :)

And our beautiful artwork! :)

my uncertain future...

argh i can't stand my indecisiveness! i thought i'd already decided on something but it seems like it's so easy to block off all those original thoughts and take on a whole new perspective! haiss..i dont have much time left to deliberate anymore..i wish i was living in decades ago and i'll be contented by just being a housewife! :s

i'm really irritated with myself..i never seem to be able to come up with a choice and stick to it..and i'm guilty that i get irritated with my daddy for constantly pressuring me into doing things..i just wanna think at my own pace!

hmm the macritchie incident made me consider environmental engineering all over again..its just this naive thought that nature is punishing us for our sins, for exploiting and destroying the Earth..and environmental engineering is the first step i can take to saving the Earth! hmm..but i think i'll get bored working in a lab setting..and studying for 5 yrs...sth i may not even like..haiss i really dunno!

anyway, some pics of us at the tree-top walk at macritchie! i think we walked at least 10km lor! it took us 5km alone just to GET TO the tree-top walk which only lasted 200-300m! but the view was nice la..very serene and simple..and later we walked damn far to get out and we were all drenched in the rain! they should really consider building more shelters along the way! very dangerous lor..we could hear the siren but we can't do anything but keep walking until we find the nearest shelter, which is still damn far away!

and daddy's birthday on wednesday! :)

yay im really happy now i've finally made up my mind! i'm so grateful for all the wise people around me who made me realise that the course which is more difficult to get into is not necessarily the better one for me..and after everything, i realised how naive i was to have applied for environmental engineering on impulse! i just though i would like it because i liked being in the environment/natural outdoors...but i didnt actually imagine myself enjoying constructing machines and gadgets to improve the way waste, water, gases etc are treated! haha...

and zk's sis lent me the 'cake mania' game to install in my comp! so excited! its something like diner dash but slightly easier and cuter and i'm really contented because i've been simply bored every night with nothing to do! there's nothing much to surf online and most of the time the people i chat to on msn are not online too! so i just rot the nights away..but now i got something simple but fun to occupy my time with muahahaha! ok i sound damn loser now..and his sis is really very cute and nice she bought chocolates for me too :D :D

went to a bar for the first time with yk, vips and mavis on fri..really enjoyed the company..i really hope our holiday plans do materialise! i hope to do sth memorable before i go back to school (which i'm quite excited about too cos i do miss studying! haha)...

as i was walking home today, i looked up and saw the lit-up living room of my home, and i never felt like wanting to reach home as soon as possible so much before..my home is really the place i feel safest in, protected from all negative aspects of the world outside..i felt more blessed than ever to step into a home with such wonderful and loving parents waiting for me to come back..

perhaps i'm really not as good as so many other people..but maybe its a blessing for me..because it made me realise that what i actually want in life is to be able to have a nice family to share a home with, to have time to meet up with friends often, and time to pursue my personal interests like craftwork, reading and cooking! I believe God has already created the right path for me..and He probably knew I wouldn't make a good doctor because of the high priority i place on family life (which i stupidly wrote about in my essay haha)..

i felt like a failure just yesterday..i guess its the natural disappointment of having to change my mindset all so suddenly..but im surprised that i recovered so fast..and strangely, i feel even more excited about my future now! with the knowing that i'll have more time on my hands...i realised that success is really what we define it to be..

and to everyone who was there for me (haha i sound like i've been through some major setback, but really, im ok la!), i really appreciate it!! its times like these when i see the beauty of friendship..and this feeling of being loved by those around me is much more precious than anything else in the world..

and congrats to all of you who got the courses you wanted!! :) :)

K-PAX

Ahh I’ve never felt so passionately about a book before! Or 3 books in this case..I MUST PROMOTE IT TO ALL OF YOU!!

It’s a trilogy actually..its K-PAX!! My language is really not good enough to convince all of you about how good the story actually is..(I was confused up till just now whether it was a true story or not but I just viewed the official movie website- IT’S BEEN MADE INTO A MOVIE IN 2001!!- and I’m quite convinced its not real la..haha) I feel like I’m doing some free-advert for the author or something..but reallyyy..all of you should go read it..

The titles of the books are:
K-PAX
K-PAX II: On a Beam of Light
K-PAX III: The Worlds of prot

Its available in some of the libraries..go borrow and read for yourselves ok!

I think it belongs to the Science fiction genre..but don’t worry its not actually sciency..if I can actually like it..it’s the most intriguing story I’ve ever read! Its full of suspense, hope and basically teaches us about life lessons in general..through a totally unexpected perspective..from someone who claims he’s from another planet called K-PAX, where everything is ideal..

For those of you who are not yet bored by my excessive rambling, this is briefly what the story is about! The narrator of the book is actually a psychatrist..and the entire book is basically describing the various mental patients at the mental institute, but mainly revolving around this patient called prot, who claims he’s from K-PAX..and the thing is, it seems almost believable! Because there is really no loophole in everything he describes about life on that planet..and he seems so damn credible because he is super knowledgeable and has this profound influence on the other patients, even helping to cure some of them whom the doctors all failed to cure! Each chapter is in the form of each session Dr. Brewer (narrator) has with prot (meant to be small letters, rhymes with goat)..and more and more is uncovered about the real personality of the patient, as prot undergoes hypnosis (which he can uncannily perform on his own!)..prot’s eyes have also been proven to be sensitive to UV light, a characteristics of insects only..

Aiya I’m like doing some book review homework..haha..but I genuinely wanna promote these books to everyone cos I feel they’re really good, and they teach us a lot of things..about humans and our selfishness..its quite a deep book..but easy to understand…

Must read for yourself to understand what I’m feeling now! Hehe..i read the first book last year..courtesy of zk..and I finished it in one day! And I thought that was all to it! Until I heard there was actually a TRILOGY!! And I went to search online and there really was!! I was damn ELATED la!! Then I immediately went to the National Library Board webbie and tracked down the locations of the books! Muahahah! I borrowed mine from Bishan lib, and I finished the remaining 2 books in 3 days! You really will just wanna read to the end of the book one..

Shall end off with some quotes from the book..

“…how does a secondary or other personalities differ from the primary one, and from the fully integrated human being? Are they completely different individuals? Or are certain things missing in the thoughts and feelings of the various alters, who are merely “parts” of a whole? Are we all simply a mix of different personalities which dominate our minds at different times? If so, which of these is responsible for our actions?”

“When you stop making killing seem admirable, when motherhood becomes less important than survival- not just your survival, but that of all the other creatures on your PLANET- you’ll be on your way to adulthood.”

“What kind of world is it where violence and war are not only accepted, but your youth are encouraged to practise them? Where your leaders must be constantly guarded against assassination, an airline travelers frisked for weapons? Where every vial of aspirin must be protected against poisoning? Where some of your beings make fortunes to play games while others are starving? Where no one believes a single word your governments or your corporations say? Where your stockbrokers and film stars are more valued than your teachers? Where the numbers of human beings increase and increase while other species are driven to extinction?..”

haha these are the more philosophical parts..but most part of the books is actually funny!
Ok la I shall end here! Hope I was convincing enough! :D

Been thinking of quite a few things lately..nothing big or significant though..had this thought quite a lot, especially as I’m walking to work with the crowd..i was wondering how amazing it is that human beings are just animals after all, but in a sense we’re so much smarter that the other animals..how we managed to manipulate our surroundings, our resources so effectively, to produce the art of language, of using words to communicate..and how we, an animal just like a dog, monkey or fish, created a whole new world of technology, from which our buildings and all other home appliances arised..it made me wonder if God really created human beings as a separate breed..a unique and special species capable of so many more things…of delving into philosophy, science, the arts…its just too specialized that we no longer view ourselves as ‘animals’ anymore..and it tends to lead me to the story of Animal Farm..i’m not really sure why too..perhaps its my whole apprehension towards religion (which I don’t wish to go into here because I don’t know very much about it) cos I can’t decide if humans are simply an evolution of apes into a much smarter species or really the offspring of Adam and Eve..

hmm..and other things like an uncertain future..but I guess I’m seeking comfort and assurance in the fact that no matter wad paths we may all take..it’ll eventually be the correct path…even if it may not seem the most ideal now, certain things that we may seem to lose now will be returned to us in other more meaningful ways...

I do get upset at work sometimes..its scary how even in a non-business-like setting, there can be ‘office politics’..how people backstab each other..how people take advantage of others..how ‘ungenuine’ some people can be..but I take comfort in the knowing that I’ll only be there for another month or so..its not that I dislike my job..i just feel like running away from everything sometimes when I get sick of how immature people can get! that there is no real friendship forged..just mere talk for the sake of taking part in conversations..and how some people think they have so much more authority than others just because they received more education..

I’ve learnt to ignore things that I shouldn’t get affected by..maybe its escapism..but as long as it doesn’t make me do or think silly things, I think its good! There’re certain things that may not be the most ideal…I used to think that as humans, anything that we can actually control is possible..but I guess we have to learn to let go of some things if dwelling on it will get us nowhere..

Haha my post sounds more pessimistic than anything..but of cos there’re happy thoughts too! Like how I feel glad that I have certain friendships..and my family..I really feel very blessed…

Really happy to have met up with 3m today….very glad that everyone’s still the same..the familiar feeling of sitting together at meals..and playing our only exciting sit-down game, mafia..cos we’re too uncreative to think of anything else! Hehe..oh and I’m intrigued by how specific songs remind me of specific periods in my life..such nostalgia..i’ve decided that it’s a sweet feeling after all! :) and I know why I like surfing the net for beautiful scenery pictures oredy..cos it gives me this same feeling of nostalgia..i know its weird cos it cant be nostalgia since I’ve never actually been to all those places before..but it’s the same feeling of knowing that I may never be able to get to that place (or that phase in my memory anymore)….